Poet: Işıl Ayça Akkuş

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ignorance

hurt more

another stab back

glorious scar honor stamp

enstrangenment

perpetual

afterall battles

renewed scars telling

care, shall I receive

unchosen

always

priority else

how invisible cuts

days merging life unalive

once

cared

felt, heard

hurting it must

I see your agony

disguise

words

perhaps prayers

just when stray

even my pain is insignificant

appears

friends

died for

lost, dust, shatter

no soul exists dark

candle

running

my cave

beloved, old, safe

my back quite aching

loving

pain

became art

their scheme, insignificant

only pushing me down

deeper

smile

don’t matter

pain is real only

if it is yours

truly

tired

outcome expected

each possibility foresee

I knew you wouldn’t

chose

still

loneliness unselective

chasing our story

once upon a time

dearly

friends

hopeful was

my world unfitting

unless convenient yours alas’

broken

crowds

habitual disappointment

not even suprised

only expected separation, demise

wolf

mercy

requested none

only sincere shoulder

like the one offered

before

all

all is

gone with story

my pain, loss, existence

unrecognized

should

one must

be dead hanging

forest, them to understand

tried

edge

standing mountains

ready to jump

should one leave testament

cried

protect

everyone else

only me fall

was harbor in storms

forgotten

care

don’t want

I don’t want

give endlessly only find

ignorance

always

somebody, something

shall one scream

they ridiculed last essence

life

leave

all behind

runaway torn towns

shall I give up

unseen

worked

runned hard

silent battles fought

If I tell a word

excuse

loved

restlessly, madly

believed changing world

If I give papers

lied

ghosts

drowning me

pulling deeper storming

they will stand proudly

funeral

invisible

live longing

hanged trees forest

my agony is disposed

used

knife

another scar

my back loves

welcomes like art portrait

wall

honor

mine stance

I stand there

it meant social suicide

recall

told

I told

everything all once

too deep to cut

kill

you

do whatever

wish you all

happy, blissfull, ignorant appeal

farewell

choose

life everyday

tables I left

no one behind alas’

abandoned

work

old wounds

heal all struggle

fought millions of battle

burned

was

I was

also your friend

when you dismiss, melting

girl

done

you did

nothing to me

that was hurtful part

ignorance

matter

it didn’t

pretend I read

books, screens, people, trains

disturbed

presence

their gazes

mocking, beating, punching

after all my battle

death

nothing

feels real

getting used to

all terror, leaving, betrayal

hopeless

merciful

don’t act

righteous, superior, warrior

much worse than them

yours

disappear

education belongs

people, pretender, glorious

none of my struggle

recognized

hurt

is important

if yours only

when it comes, me?

surrender

nevertheless

no curse

bad wishes to

we shared sorrow once

real

best

wishes, lives

I wish was

care for me once

dear

resent

I resent

days, months, years

I choose anyone except

me

dancing

death, grief

oldest friends o’mine

I choose my sword

hesitated

sword

my weapon

alter darkness fractioned

surviving bastard among hunters

survived

sweat

forehead announced

thousand cures deaths

I bend them, phoenix

reborned

vision

blurry oranges

I want back

why I keep mothering

foes

father

I was

better figure family

I set them free

strong

happy

days unchosen

granted for taken

frozen majesty appears then

hello

mastery

of mine

goodbyes, wishes, ghosts

crowds belong, I never

identify

understand

your viewpoint

tired of labor

no soul give receipt

unpaid

emotional

validation only

if yours solely

my experience is not

dictated

reality

is mine

giving up weights

only lifting, colorful trampolines

rebound

elastic

is heart

warrior I become

enjoying wounds on back

fuel

power

keep going

burn all figures

left and sold you

second

benefit

of doubt

given even traitors

when it comes to me,

gone

girl

is wolf

raised by moon

do not get flattered

first

last

neither, none

always thin line

I walk through trust

untrust

exist

expect, resist

no hopes humanity

I have none left

done